chubby is the new sexy


sabi ng asawa ko sakin kasi sabi ko ung waistline ko wala na sa medium size.

asa large na.

my gosh hahaha. arti arti. sabi ko hindi na kasya ung iba kong damit sakin sabi niya problema ba yun edi bumili ng bago. ang supportive hahaha.

gusto ko talagang magdiet pero sa tuwing may pagkain akong nakikita at binibigyan niya ko ng pagkain lagi kong sinasabi sa sarili ko ay “eat today, diet tomorrow.

eto na talaga ung sumpa ng pagtanda chos sumpa talaga. mabagal na metabolism. tapos ung kain ko nung dalaga ako ganun pa din ako kumain ngayon tapos work from home pa ko. sinong hindi tataba hahahaha

alam ko naman na dapat mindful eating na ako kaso mahirap magpigil pag masarap ang pagkain. basta soon. mga bukas or next month. or balang araw.

for the mean time kakain muna ko ng waffle at magkakape for the nth time.

yum yum yum..

don’t count the eggs before they are hatched…


as of now, may 2 akong work online. ung isa full time tapos isang part-time.

supposedly may isa pa kong part-time as CS sa isang website na may adult content. kahapon ung start ko pero unfortunately kahapon din ako tinanggal hahaha ang sakit besh. nageexpect na ko ng dagdag income. ung kahit hindi ako familiar sa mga products nila na mala-50 Shades of Grey gora lang ako kasi 2 hrs per day lang tapos ayun ambilis lang. Wala pa kong nakakaisang araw na natapos tanggal agad. Ganito kasi un, ang sabi sakin log in time ko is 1PM till 2 PM PST so nung sumapit ung time na un inopen ko si Hubstaff at nagclick ng start time. From time to time, chinecheck ko ung mailbox for any customers email at pati website at mga email drafts para mafamiliarize sa work-around process. Isang oras at kalahati ung lumipas, nakadalawang emails lang ako so sabi ko petiks sabay nagemail ung bossing sabi “very low productivity” tapos biglang nawalan na ko ng access sa CS mailbox pati sa mga dropbox folders and email drafts. Nagreply ako na ano gagawin ko, wala namang email na dumating maliban sa 2 customer emails. Hindi na nila ko nireplayan gang kanina lang sabi nung Pinay na senior CS, dapat daw icclick ko lng ung start sa Hubstaff pag may ginagawa akong email inshort ndi xa continuous unless madami tlagang gawa. So aun, masama ng konti ung loob ko kasi last week pa lng nagtanong na ko sa kanya kung paano ung proseso sa company, pano ung ganito ganyan tapos nakadalawang email pa ko pero nganga. walang reply. Tapos isang email lng ni bossing reply siya agad tapos kineclaim nya pa na dalawang beses siyang nagpadala ng email sakin regarding those info. duh. shunga ba ko. if may malinaw na instructions at orientation silang binigay edi sana ndi ko irrun ung Hubstaff ng tuloy tuloy kahit walang gawa. Saka nakakainis lang kasi oras mo ung binabayaran supposedly tapos ang gusto per email eh wala naman sa job post nila un. ah basta unfair.

anyhow, magmomove on na ako, nagtanong ako if part pa ba ko ng team or terminated na ko eh kaso wala na namang reply so inalis ko na sila sa OLJ profile ko as part-time employer. gusto nila ganyanan eh.

so far, pangalawa na sila sa ungas na employer na naencounter ko from OLJ. ung isa sa sobrang pagkaungas, pinagwork kami (anim kami puro Pinay freelancers) one week un (ako 4hours for 3 days lang trinabaho kasi late hired) tapos biglang the next week wala na kami lahat access sa folders and everything tapos siya super reklamo na incapable kami kaya pinalitan nya kami at hindi din binayaran. Oo ikaw un CEO ng Gold Virtual Assistant, Ms. Arriana Cromartie. buti na lang natanggal na siya sa OLJ at ung mga kasamahan ko nagfile na ng report sa kung saan sang site na pwede siya ireport.

may karma din kayo. hmpp.

nabasa ko lang


nakita ko to sa FB story ng dati kong katrabaho, ang tanda ko wala na sila nung isa ko pang dating katrabaho pero may anak sila. at base sa update nya sa newsfeed ko may bago na siyang jowabelles. (ang tsismosa ko, right?hahaha) oh well bihira naman ako magpost sa FB at ang ginagawa ko lang ay maglike at magheart ng post ng friends ko. She just happen to caught my attention because she keeps on posting about being overly depressed and suicide is so damn rampant that I just couldn’t shake her off my thoughts because as far as I can remember, she’s one of the jolliest person I know.

anyhow, whoever made her feel that way deserves the middle finger.

I did the middle finger to Hitler a million times in my mind but he’s still together with mamadear. I wonder, iniisip din kaya ni mama nun na may kulang sa kanya kaya naghahanap si Papa ng iba?

I also wonder though I have yet to experience but I’m already trying to prepare myself for it. (pero hindi ako sure if I’ll ever be ready) Would I be forgiving as my mother? at mag-iisip din ba ako ng mga thoughts na “kapalit-palit ba ko?” gaya nung lines ni Liza Soberano dun sa movie nila ni Enrique Gil na My Ex and Why’s.

oh well papel, wag pangunahan. baka magkatotoo, hahaha buset na FB story…kung saan saan na nakarating ung utak ko…

when you’re not into politics but your mom is…


so my mom sent me a pim in FB saying she’ll run for kagawad, that was like 2 weeks ago, (if my memory serves me right) I just shrugged it off jokingly saying “ikaw ma, kung san ka masaya suportahan ta ka”

so now she sent me another pim with this picture

looks like there’s no turning back now, looks like Hitler’s into it too.

oh well, if she win, that’s an additional headache but I guess that’s an achievement unlock too, for her.

anyhow, whatever happens, I’ll just be here to support her all the way.

good luck mamadear!

like a specimen under a microscope


so I’ve been doing billing for almost 2 months now with my Cali-based employer. To monitor our productivity, they have installed timedoctor in our desktop. Before, that tracker used to take random screenshot of our active window and will stop time tracking once our window become idle for 8-10 minutes. However, just recently, they have taken the monitoring to a new level, they also take webcam shots every 10 minutes now and it’s really irritating coz it makes me feel like the big Boss is sitting right beside me looking exactly at my every movement.

I mentioned this to his Filipina VA (virtual assistant)and she said that webcam shots has been there for quite some time, perhaps, mine was just activated a little late. Oh well, perhaps big B’s got a lot of trust issues. Anyhow, I recently intereacted with a co-biller and she said she wasn’t comfortable having her photo taken thru webcam and she had covered hers since she started home-based job and big B hasn’t scolded her about it yet. She added it wasn’t on the print she signed therefore she’ll continue covering her webcam until she gets reprimanded. I was thinking of doing the same but I couldn’t find a good reason to justify why I’ll be covering it since I had mine started taking photos like 2 days ago and I didn’t complain.

Hmm. Oh I also learned that Big B really has some trust issues and he’s a little stingy. They said he doesn’t give increases and bonuses which makes me a little disappointed and made me think of finding another one. His VA for example has another client aside from Big B so I was hoping I could find another client too. Well, wish me luck. Hope that webcam shots won’t be taking photos lesser than 10 minutes or else…hayyy.

Just my two cents


Recently my 2nd elder sister posted a status update in FB saying “kelan ko kaya ulit makikita ang mga barkada ko, namimiss ko na sila”. My husband’s always updated on Fb and he immediately related my sister’s status update to me saying it’s inappropriate to post something like that considering my sister’s got huge responsibility having 7 kids on her back (one’s with us so there’s 6 remaining kids). I replied saying “tao pa din naman siya”. I mean I know my sister can really be selfish at times but I also know she cares for her kids. I mean once you become a parent, do you have to lose yourself in the process of being one? I don’t think so. I mean, your kids have to come first most of the time like 99% but isn’t it fair to keep atleast 1% for yourself? Otherwise how else would you keep your sanity? Perhaps those know-it-alls parents or not would say that’s bull because once you subjected yourself into creating another life, you have to be responsible for them like for the rest of your life. I don’t remember who said this to me not sure if it’s my mom or my sister, “kapag nagka-anak ka na, sa kanila na iikot ang mundo mo”. I mean this could be partly true coz nowadays my world literally revolves around my kids. I couldn’t remember the last time I stepped out of the house without my kids with me. Even when I work they’re with me though not the whole 8 hours otherwise they’ll throw into a tantrum.

Having kids will literally turn your world upside down. They did mine. But do I regret having them?No. I would always choose a life with them in it. But if I could go back, perhaps I would have had them at a later time when we have everything ready, house of our own, stable source of income where we don’t have to worry about what’s going to happen in the future. That could have been better but anyway I guess life’s like that, it always happens the least we expect it will.

Ooopps, this post got longer than it should. I just hope everything will turn out fine. Hope my kids will turn out happy and kind. I hope my parenting wouldn’t suck as I’m expecting it would. Hahaha. I think I talked too much today I mean I typed too much rather. Lack of sleep does that to you I guess.

Before I further blabber nonsense, I’d have to take off because I’m still working at this hour. 40 minutes more before my log out time. Shhh my son’s sleeping. Gotta shut up now.

PUPPP U!!!!


It’s been 4 days now and I am literally dying on the inside because of my condition called Pruritic Urticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy. According to the dermatologist that I went to, this usually starts during third trimester of pregnancy and most of those affected are the ones carrying baby boy. Also, more often only 1 out of 200 gets inflicted with this condition. (So ganun ako kaswerte 😦 ) It usually starts on the tummy (that’s where it started for me) then slowly spreads to the back, arms and legs. The itch that comes with the hives is the worst possible itch you can imagine (literal na nakikipagbargain na ko kung ano ung dapat kong gawin)

I miss sleeping soundly through the night. I can barely catch zzzzs right now. I tried katinko, sudocrem, Elidel, cetaphil lotion and herbal lotion recommended by tatay), alcohol but nothing seems to help. My OB prescribed me an antihistamine named Cetirizine to help me catch some snooze but it doesn’t have any effect at all. I cried hard last night because I feel like I am cursed (as in un talaga pakiramdam ko, iniisip ko pa nga nakulam ako hahaha). After I came to my senses, I just decided to google it just to check if there’s someone out there unlucky as me and voila! There were other unlucky preggies like me who got the horrible PUPPP! Unfortunately, I only came across 1 Filipina who got it and most are Caucasians. They were telling about this pine tar soap that works wonders for them. I immediately search the net for this and had to get Shopee app because that’s the only site I checked where this pine tar soap is available. I immediately ordered but would have to wait till Saturday next week until I received it because according to the reseller. She’ll have to get it from the US. (Kill me now) I’m not sure if I still have some decent skin by that time. For now, I’d have to stick with the hypoallergenic soap, betamethasone lotion and cetirizine that my doctors prescribed me.

Still miserable at this time. (Scratch, scratch, scratch) I hope it will get better soon. I’m hanging on the saying “this too, shall pass”

 

ganito ata talaga kapag tumatanda


Dati laging manga at kung anu-anong fictional novels, stories whatsoever ang bet kong basahin pero ngayon hindi na masyado (pero syempre ibang usapan pag yung mga sinusubaybayan ko talaga)

Anyways, I’m currently obsessed on reading financial independence. Naisip ko sana noon pa ko naadik sa pagbabasa tungkol dun edi sana may nasimulan na ako. Sa sobrang dami kong gustong gawin natuturete ung utak ko hahaha. Andaming what ifs bigla, could have, should have, would have eklavu.

Isa sa websites na kasalukuyan kong binabasa at ung http://www.thinkpesos.com saka ung imoney.ph at as sobrang daming ideas nila lahat yun gusto kong gawin. Haha mula sa savings, investing ek ek. Sana masimulan hahahaha cross fingers. Pero sabi nga dun aral muna bago invest. Andami ko pang dapat matutunan young tipong so much to do so little time and energy, minus the fact that I’m preggy, may isa pang clingy human being na panganay ko na dapat asikasuhin. Andaming plano. Iniiisip ko pa lang hagardo verzosa na.

Ayun. Anung oras na pala, isang araw na naman any lilipas sa maternity leave ko hahaha makatulog na nga.

damn, it feels good


After working abroad for years side by side with someone who doesn’t have an ounce of appreciation his body, I have forgotten how it feels being recognized for a job well done. 

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thanks to my TL for making me remember 😊

how does it feel


when you’re on your late twenties and still feel the odd one out

confusing. on my part because I’m already old enough to be equipped with social skills and yet I don’t apply it. I’m not just good with people. I’ll smile, talk a bit and that’s that. Period.

surprisingly, even though I don’t quite fit in where I am right now,  I don’t care at all as long as I’m doing my job and at the end of the shift, I’ll go home with my daddylabs and babylabs.  back then I’d lose myself thinking what’s wrong with me, now I don’t care anymore. to hell with what they’re thinking.

someone from my work place said I am an antisocial, even called me a lonewolf, I had a hard time fighting myself to tell him to research the meaning of the word and give him the middle finger . Yes, I am aloof and yes, I’m quite reserved but I am not an antisocial.  I am selectively social. There’s a big difference. char. good thing I didn’t give in to his senseless comments about my personality, I just figured out yesterday he’s considered one of the “maluwang ang turnilyo” peeps in office. thank God for my instinct.