chubby is the new sexy


sabi ng asawa ko sakin kasi sabi ko ung waistline ko wala na sa medium size.

asa large na.

my gosh hahaha. arti arti. sabi ko hindi na kasya ung iba kong damit sakin sabi niya problema ba yun edi bumili ng bago. ang supportive hahaha.

gusto ko talagang magdiet pero sa tuwing may pagkain akong nakikita at binibigyan niya ko ng pagkain lagi kong sinasabi sa sarili ko ay “eat today, diet tomorrow.

eto na talaga ung sumpa ng pagtanda chos sumpa talaga. mabagal na metabolism. tapos ung kain ko nung dalaga ako ganun pa din ako kumain ngayon tapos work from home pa ko. sinong hindi tataba hahahaha

alam ko naman na dapat mindful eating na ako kaso mahirap magpigil pag masarap ang pagkain. basta soon. mga bukas or next month. or balang araw.

for the mean time kakain muna ko ng waffle at magkakape for the nth time.

yum yum yum..

Advertisements

dahil sa Stay


sabi ko manunuod ako ng movie sa netflix basta petiks sa work tapos napunta ako sa youtube tapos pinanuod at pinakinggan ko ung Stay ng Blackpink kasi nacurious ako sa laki ng fanbase nila tapos ayun, buong shift na akong nanunuod at nakikinig ng music videos ng mga kanta nila, syet hahaha

death penalty for rape


I was browsing my FB newsfeed when a post caught my eye. Streaks of blood in a hospital floor. I got curious and I read through the article then I got furious. A 5 year old female kid was raped. Yes. Raped. Her lower part was bleeding so much the nurse and bystanders thought she got caught up in an accident. No info was given regarding who did that unimaginable thing to an innocent kid. I hope they rot in hell real bad. I hope someone will make them pay. I actually wish them dead so they’ll do no further harm.

I wish for death penalty as a punishment to those fucking rapist. Sa mga pabibo na magsasabing hindi kamatayan ang sagot, tangina sabihin niyo yan sa limang taong gulang na binaboy ng mga rapist na yun. At sa mga iba pang pabibo na magsasabing buti nga hindi pinatay, sabihin nyo yan sa batang yun at sa lahat ng biktima ng rape na kahit matanda na sila ramdam at tanda nila ung kababuyang ginawa sa kanila. I should know. Someone close to me was almost raped and she still has nightmares until now. How much more to those rape victims? Pano nila haharapin ung kinabukasan?It would take a lifetime perhaps more to move on sa ganyang pangyayari sa buhay.

Pamura na din sa mga victim blamers na nagsasabing walang mararape kung maayos manamit. Punyeta sabihin nyo sakin kung kamaniac maniac ba ung 5 years old na batang babae na nakapantulog.

Gigil na gigil ako sa nangyari sa batang yun at ipinapanalangin kong makayanan nya yung dagok na un sa buhay niya. I wish no other kids, women or man shall suffer the way she did. Fuck rapists. Fuck drugs. Fuck evil.

Sorry naman sa puro murang post. Gigil much talaga ko. May anak akong babae. I couldn’t imagine what is going on inside that kid’s mom and dad’s mind. Just imagining something horrible like that might happen to my kids makes me want to go on a rampage. Ay talaga naman. maghahalo ang balat sa tinalupan.

don’t count the eggs before they are hatched…


as of now, may 2 akong work online. ung isa full time tapos isang part-time.

supposedly may isa pa kong part-time as CS sa isang website na may adult content. kahapon ung start ko pero unfortunately kahapon din ako tinanggal hahaha ang sakit besh. nageexpect na ko ng dagdag income. ung kahit hindi ako familiar sa mga products nila na mala-50 Shades of Grey gora lang ako kasi 2 hrs per day lang tapos ayun ambilis lang. Wala pa kong nakakaisang araw na natapos tanggal agad. Ganito kasi un, ang sabi sakin log in time ko is 1PM till 2 PM PST so nung sumapit ung time na un inopen ko si Hubstaff at nagclick ng start time. From time to time, chinecheck ko ung mailbox for any customers email at pati website at mga email drafts para mafamiliarize sa work-around process. Isang oras at kalahati ung lumipas, nakadalawang emails lang ako so sabi ko petiks sabay nagemail ung bossing sabi “very low productivity” tapos biglang nawalan na ko ng access sa CS mailbox pati sa mga dropbox folders and email drafts. Nagreply ako na ano gagawin ko, wala namang email na dumating maliban sa 2 customer emails. Hindi na nila ko nireplayan gang kanina lang sabi nung Pinay na senior CS, dapat daw icclick ko lng ung start sa Hubstaff pag may ginagawa akong email inshort ndi xa continuous unless madami tlagang gawa. So aun, masama ng konti ung loob ko kasi last week pa lng nagtanong na ko sa kanya kung paano ung proseso sa company, pano ung ganito ganyan tapos nakadalawang email pa ko pero nganga. walang reply. Tapos isang email lng ni bossing reply siya agad tapos kineclaim nya pa na dalawang beses siyang nagpadala ng email sakin regarding those info. duh. shunga ba ko. if may malinaw na instructions at orientation silang binigay edi sana ndi ko irrun ung Hubstaff ng tuloy tuloy kahit walang gawa. Saka nakakainis lang kasi oras mo ung binabayaran supposedly tapos ang gusto per email eh wala naman sa job post nila un. ah basta unfair.

anyhow, magmomove on na ako, nagtanong ako if part pa ba ko ng team or terminated na ko eh kaso wala na namang reply so inalis ko na sila sa OLJ profile ko as part-time employer. gusto nila ganyanan eh.

so far, pangalawa na sila sa ungas na employer na naencounter ko from OLJ. ung isa sa sobrang pagkaungas, pinagwork kami (anim kami puro Pinay freelancers) one week un (ako 4hours for 3 days lang trinabaho kasi late hired) tapos biglang the next week wala na kami lahat access sa folders and everything tapos siya super reklamo na incapable kami kaya pinalitan nya kami at hindi din binayaran. Oo ikaw un CEO ng Gold Virtual Assistant, Ms. Arriana Cromartie. buti na lang natanggal na siya sa OLJ at ung mga kasamahan ko nagfile na ng report sa kung saan sang site na pwede siya ireport.

may karma din kayo. hmpp.

heart & hate relationship


Dear Lazada,

I hate you…

I hate you because you make me feel poor (I couldn’t afford all the good stuff in your platform)

I hate you because every time I open your app, I keep on adding stuff in my cart that will just sit there for decades but will never be bought (exaggerated much?may dekada na ba ung lazada?hahaha)

I hate you because you keep on emptying my wallet (feeling ko monthly may inoorder ako sayo hahaha)

On the other hand..

I heart you because you make shopping convenient (lalo sa taong bahay na katulad ko na once a week minsan twice a week pa nakakalabas ng lungga)

I heart you because you show me incredible stuff that I like (like the Kiiplix and Paperang na sayo ko lang nadiscover pati ung mga multivitamins na gummies para sa mga junakis ko tapos ung mga bags na magaganda pero ang mamahal para sa ordinaryong taong kagaya ko,hahaha)

I already tried uninstalling you because I keep on checking you everyday looking for good stuff to buy but still I installed you back because my phone feels empty without the your icon (hahaha adik na)

I hope I’ll get over you soon.

Otherwise, just give more discount vouchers especially for expensive but really good stuff. It would be much appreciated.

one of your loyal shoppers,

Aubu

nabasa ko lang


nakita ko to sa FB story ng dati kong katrabaho, ang tanda ko wala na sila nung isa ko pang dating katrabaho pero may anak sila. at base sa update nya sa newsfeed ko may bago na siyang jowabelles. (ang tsismosa ko, right?hahaha) oh well bihira naman ako magpost sa FB at ang ginagawa ko lang ay maglike at magheart ng post ng friends ko. She just happen to caught my attention because she keeps on posting about being overly depressed and suicide is so damn rampant that I just couldn’t shake her off my thoughts because as far as I can remember, she’s one of the jolliest person I know.

anyhow, whoever made her feel that way deserves the middle finger.

I did the middle finger to Hitler a million times in my mind but he’s still together with mamadear. I wonder, iniisip din kaya ni mama nun na may kulang sa kanya kaya naghahanap si Papa ng iba?

I also wonder though I have yet to experience but I’m already trying to prepare myself for it. (pero hindi ako sure if I’ll ever be ready) Would I be forgiving as my mother? at mag-iisip din ba ako ng mga thoughts na “kapalit-palit ba ko?” gaya nung lines ni Liza Soberano dun sa movie nila ni Enrique Gil na My Ex and Why’s.

oh well papel, wag pangunahan. baka magkatotoo, hahaha buset na FB story…kung saan saan na nakarating ung utak ko…

when you had to deal with fears you never had


kahapon napanuod ko sa tv na ibinalita ung MOMO challenge kung saan nililink ung pagkamatay nung batang uminom ng 21 tabs of anti-gout. tapos nagbrowse ako sa fb at nakita ko na naman un. may nakita din akong post ng isang mom wherein while her daughter was watching Peppa Pig in Youtube kids, there was a sudden clip that was shown that gives step by step instruction on how to slice one’s wrist.

Ayun, kinilabutan ako ng bongga at nag-alala ng husto para kina Piatot at Bastelog ko. Jusme, anung klaseng mga tao naman ung gumagawa ng ganun. Bakit mga bata pa ung tinatarget nila.

Kakapanuod ko lang din ng babiesforsaleph ni Atom Araullo nung isang araw at sobra din akong naapektuhan. May mga batang ilang araw pa lang binebenta na ng magulang online tapos meron din nagnanakaw pa ng anak ng iba. Tapos meron pa na nangunguha ng bata para kuhaan ng internal organs. Jusmelord, iniisip ko pa lang gawin nila un sa anak ko, napapraning na ako na nababaliw na mamamatay.

dahil sa mga nababasa at napapanuod ko sa tv at online, parang gusto kong ibalik sa tyan ko ung dalawa kong junakis para lagi ko lang silang kasama. parang pwede naman un…hahaha

sabi ko sa nag-aalaga ng anak ko, oras na mangyari ung ganun sakin, (jusme ni sa panaginip wag naman) gagamitin ko lahat ng resources ko para huntingin ung gumawa ng game at pipira-pirasuhin ko sila, pag naman ung mga nangunguha ng bagets para ibenta or kuhanan ng organs, papahirapan ko sila ng husto hanggang sa iwish nila na sana hindi na lang sila pinanganak sa mundong ibabaw.

grabe. matagal ko nang alam na mahirap na maging nanay pero iba pa din pala pag ikaw na nakakaexperience, ganito pala na sobrang nakakapraning.

iniisip ko si mama. gaano kaya kahirap sa kanya na sobrang independent ako nun simula elem gang grumadweyt para pakawalan ako at hayaan akong gawin ang mga gusto ko ng mag-isa.

ako kaya pano ko un gagawin sa mga anak ko, hahaha

grabe. my thoughts are running wild at this wee hours of the night…

I see it everywhere..


So I have already finished taking the exam I mentioned on my last post and I am currently waiting for the results and no matter how much I try calming my mind, I just see it everywhere. I browse my FB and IG account and an ad about the exam I’ve taken pops up. I read an article about what-nots and the name of someone mentioned in the article rhymes with the exam name. I sleep and I dreamed that I got 56 on all areas which literally makes me feel like I’m doomed. Gosh. Exam results come out now, save me from myself. Achieving tranquility amidst this world is easier said than done.

will do binge-watching on Netflix, perhaps this will help a little..


so I am reviewing for an upcoming English exam and I was getting my confidence slowly until my boss called me via skype

boss: hey Aubu, how are you?

me: I’m good, how are you?

boss: so I’d like you to meet Erika, she’s the new chief operating officer of the Billing Dept.

me: nice to meet you

boss: so we called to ask you how confident you are if you are to go back to posting payments and codes

me: I’m quite confident. I just think I need some refreshments (instead of refresher course, the hell, gutom siguro ko)

boss: okay, we just need your opinion about this coz we’ll be doing some minor changes with the job descriptions and duties and all.

me: okay (ung gusto kong magfacepalm dahil sa refreshments)

boss: okay bye we’ll get in touch with you soon.

ung totoo.. ung confidence level ko back to zero hahaha so wish me luck talaga😂

spot on


so I was complaining that my injectable contraceptive is making me gain weight or I just have a hearty appetite to which my husband said “matagal ka nang matakaw, humina lang panunaw mo”.