Kanina sa training, pinagsulat kami ng top 3 values sa post-it paper
isulat daw namin at lagyan ng star sa tabi ng word ung top values that we can’t live without,
ung isinulat ko ay : professionalism, maturity at discipline
tapos ung nilagyan ko ng star ung professionalism
tapos nung tinatawag na kami isa-isa, gusto ko sanang palitan ng maturity ung professionalism
pero dahil kahiyaan na, pinangatawanan ko na lang ung una kong nilagay
second to the last akong natawag,
unang tumawag ng pansin sa trainer namin ung maliit kong sulat sa post-it paper
sabi nya, “Don’t get me wrong, there’s this notion that small handwriting equates low self-esteem. Does this mean that you’ve got low self-esteem?”
ako, “No? (parang di pa ako sigurado, hehe) That’s just how I write. It’s neater that way. (akala ko kasi talaga lalagyan pa ng explanation sa baba nung mga words na sinulat namin)
sabi nya, “Okay? (parang ayaw nya maniwala) So you’ve chosen professionalism. Please explain.
ako, “Ahm, I’ve chosen professionalism because it’s like an umbrella which routes to other values. If you’re professional, you’re mature and disciplined enough to handle difficult situations. For example, if I were to be placed in a world full of vices and one approached me and ask me for example (puro na lang for example, hehe), to smoke, I would be able to weigh the pros and cons of smoking, and, since I’m a professional, I would be able to decline the offer in a correct manner without actually offending the person himself.” (sabay hinga, whew, nakakaubos kaya ng english ang training na un)
sabi nya, “Great! (akala ko talaga okay na at wala nang follow up pero makalipas ang ilang segundo…) Actually, I was expecting a more enthusiastic answer like I chose professionalism, (in a cheerful and strong voice) because yada yada yada, nakalimutan ko na ung exact nyang sinabi. I’ll expect more from you. On the next workshop, you’ll be in the hot seat. (Smiles)
ako, lunok sabay tungo. (gudlak naman sakin, sana lang magtransform ako within 1 week noh)
naobsess ako ng onti kung anu nga ba ang ibig sabihin ng self-esteem.
high school at college pinag-aaralan na namin un, pero ngayon lang ako nagdoubt ng bonggang bongga sa self-esteem ko.
sabi dun sa isang nabasa ko, Self-esteem is the experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and being worthy of happiness.
hmm, napaisip ako, alam kong competent ako. (Please take note that I am not saying this stuff in retaliation to what the trainer said about me, defensive as it may sound but I assure you that it’s not)
give me a specific work or assignment and instruct me correctly how to do it and I’m 100% sure I would be able to do it.
actually, minsan nga nayayabangan ako sa sarili ko. Though, it’s not that obvious, there are times that I’m so full of myself.
A good example is the time when I was reviewing for the board exam while working in a call centre,
My family as well as our dean keep on saying then that I should quit my job to make sure that I’ll pass the board. Considering that I’m one of the so called the cream of the crop, they had such high hopes for me.
However, hard-headed that I was, I pursue my grand plan of working while reviewing.
And you can’t imagine how proud I am, that I was able to pass with a grade of 80+ in comparison to those who spent their full time reviewing. (Humility calling aubu), oha, oha, pero siyempre that is something na ipagyayabang ko lang kung kinakailangan.
Hindi naman batayan ng tao ang mataas na grado. Maliban sa hindi nakakain yun, madaming iba dyan na may brilliant minds pero bulok ang pagkatao.
Mabalik tayo sa self-esteem, dati siguro aminado ako na mababa ung confidence ko, but does it necessarily mean that I’ve got low self-esteem? I dunno. Ang alam medyo anti-social ako at loner pero kung pagtingin sa sarili ang usapan, aba eh, hindi ako palalamang dyan, hehe,
Anyhow, sabi ko naman sa sarili ko dati, kailangan ko ng personality development dahil nga medyo anti-social ako at hindi outspoken, baka ito nga yun kailangan ko at para na din sa ikakauunlad ko bilang tao. Nakanaks, wahaha